I'm still not stitching or doing any other crafting. I'm just trying to keep my head above water with caring for the girls and keeping up with the house. Fortunately, the girls are thriving at 14 weeks, and our au pair has arrived. I'm starting to get some regular sleep. Yeah!
This post has been in my head since August. I knew when I found out in April that I was having girls that I was in for a world of pink. I very actively told my friends and family that I hate pink to limit the amount of pink stuff I received. It worked pretty well - I have enough clothing to dress the girls so that one is in pink and one is in not-pink. Why is it that our society feels compelled to dress little girls so extensively in pink? There's a whole spectrum of colors out there that should be explored and embraced. I'm amused when we go out that nearly everyone asks if the babies are boys unless I've dressed them almost totally in pink. A friend of mine thinks it's the short hair that triggers this question as much of the clothing.
The other thing I didn't notice until I had girls of my own is the cute sayings that are imprinted on children's clothes. Do we have to label our children as cute from day one? Anyway, I find it a little disturbing that the girls' phrases tend to focus on beauty - pretty this, cute that. I'm not sure what to think about the professional labels. I can live with "pretty ballerina". The one I find truly upsetting is "future princess". Think about this for a minute. How does one become a princess? One is either born to it or one marries the prince. So from birth, we as a society have decided it's OK to tell our girls that the only thing they need to aspire to is capturing the prince. Scary!
4 comments:
Try not to let it get to you too much. The influence you have over your daughters will be far stronger than what society dictates, and your early awareness of that puts you in a good position to teach them how to decide which of society's messages to accept and which to reject.
I have a fundamental disagreement with my SIL and whether or not her child (my 6 year old niece) should be allowed to play with Barbies. Originally, Barbies were banned, but then her sister gave her some of her own daughter's old Barbies, and suddenly Barbies were allowed. They're now back on the "banned" list (I'm sure until the next time her sister gives her more Barbies).
My SIL is convinced that playing with Barbies will give her child a bad body image, and they focus too much on physical appearance. I, on the other hand, remember being entertained for HOURS with Barbies, clothes, etc. I think they're a great imaginary tool for girls, and I don't see anything wrong with them, but I do respect her wishes and I don't buy Barbies for my niece. Eventually, though, I hope my SIL comes to realize that what she teaches her daughter is far more important than the toys she plays with.
Glad to hear you're getting some sleep. That will go a long way towards defining the new "normal" in your life. I realized after the first baby what a great interrogation technique sleep deprivation is. I would have said anything anyone wanted to hear if they could have guaranteed six uninterrupted hours.
It took me years, but I have finally admitted to loving the color pink. But I like the stronger, darker pinks and not so much the pastelly baby girl shades.
As for the "cute" sayings. You can always counteract them with the subversive. Maybe not as offensive as Julie Jackson's stuff, but I know there's plenty of alternatives out there like:
http://www.sandboxthreads.com/
I'm fond of the "This is the oldest I've been." I may have to do something myself with that saying.
All I can say is wait until they are old enough to have those and even more offensive sayings written across the south end of their north headed pants...
Yikes!
JS
Jennifer - yes, I have more influence, but I'm definitely fighting an uphill battle. I too grew up playing for hours with Barbies. I think I knew that they were fictional body types (if I ever thought about it) since they didn't look like any of the women I knew.
Donna - Sleep, oh yes, precious sleep. I'll have to look into the subversive stuff. I deal better with darker pinks than pastel pink too.
JS - I can't even begin to worry about the sayings across their north and south parts. Scary!
Mares - Sorry your comment got lost. I'm sorry that little boys get labelled too. I deal much better with purple than pink, but I know you don't like purple.
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